THE YOUNG PERSON'S SURVIVAL GUIDE

My name is Alex Dean and, right now, I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time. After a rather complicated childhood with lots of drama between my parents – who divorced when I was 7 – I’ve finally figured out that my happiness and health should be a priority for both me and my parents. I’ve written this book, drawing on my own experiences and those of a number of other wonderful contributors, to help put to paper the lessons that I’ve learned and how I came to learn them. I hope that, if my book conveys them successfully, it will save you a lot of difficult work in understanding what's going on in your life or, at least, put you on a better path to putting yourself and your needs first.

When her parents separated, Alex Dean found herself in a situation where, in order to maintain the care of one parent, she was required to reject the other. Not only that, but she was also forced to make false allegations about the parent she was rejecting. Her journey to safety was long and complex. It involved the family courts and the intervention of specialist professionals. Having reached her majority, she is now able to reflect on her experiences and offer advice to other children and young people who may find themselves in similar circumstances. In this inspiring book, Alex Dean describes her experiences of being in the care of an unpredictable and abusive parent, the harm it did to her, and her path to recovery.

‘Choosing Yourself When Your Parents Separate is quite simply remarkable. It tells the story of the harm that is caused when children become alienated in divorce and separation, from a young person who experienced it and recovered. Packed full of strategies to help other children and young people recognise their experience, this book does something special, it takes the reader by the hand and sensitively broadens perspective and understanding. The book is not just for children and young people, however. It will inform all parents and those who work with them, about the internal life of the alienated child and what can be done to help them. This book is a gift to all who suffer this family relationship trauma.'

Karen Woodall, Psychotherapist, London.